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lotus0kidHey, remember way back when I did that on-going post for John Carpenter’s The Thing? Well, Netflix Instant Play has presented me with the opportunity to watch David Cronenberg’s The Fly right here and now. As with The Thing, The Fly has quite a solid reputation for giving people the heebs. So, if I have to do some freaked out flailing, I figure it’s better to do it here rather than in my own head, where it might get stuck. So here goes.
You know, yesterday I actually killed a huge fly that was sailing around my room. I’m... probably going to feel pretty crappy about that at the end of this.
Wow, this is some intense music over the credits, Howard Shore. Kind of playing up a “Dracula”-ish feeling, IMO, what with the star-crossed romance.
Hee. Hi, young Jeff Goldblum, with your slightly too wide eyes, flirting with young Geena Davis. Heh, he’s got motion sickness like David in Independence Day. Reference? Probably not.
Yeah, Geena, when a guy takes you to a secluded industrial area, it’s time to get scared. No matter how adorkable he seems. Aww, he’s playing piano! No, still creepy. “I should be leaving.” “I can’t let you leave here alive.” NO, Jeff Goldblum, that’s BAD flirting! But, since she gave him her stocking as a test subject for his teleportation device, unrolling it all sexy-like, she obviously doesn’t mind.
Mm, cheese-tastic ‘80s effects. “Look, guys, he has a com-pu-ter!” (I can’t help myself.) But I did like when the other telepod flashed behind him and he didn’t look. Hm, he doesn’t really know how all the parts of his machine work? That’s unfortunate, I can already tell. And, okay, Seth Brundle is kind of an idiot if he thought he could bring Reporter Veronica home promising to show her something awesome, and then get upset when she wants to write about it.
Mmkay, Veronica’s involved with her jerk-ish editor, who she finds in her shower when she goes back to her apartment. Yeah, send him packing, Veronica, though you should’ve got that key. Or maybe not, from what I’ve heard, the jerk-ish editor guy has a part to play when things get weird.
Oh, uh oh, teleporting the baboon, I heard about this, *cringes*... Ewww. Yeah, that was pretty bad. Did it have to still be moving? I don’t think it had to still be moving. Oh gross, Veronica wants steak after that? Jeez, lady. Whoops, here comes the romance, complete with cheesy ‘80s alto saxophone.
Hm, okay, we’re trying to teleport the steaks, and the music indicates it’s going to work. Teleported steak = not tasty, as it happens. People say “flesh” a lot in this movie. But oh boy, Seth’s worked out how to stop living things from exploding in his telepod! But oh no, jerk-ish editor guy has discovered Veronica’s still working with Seth! (She said she was giving up on the story.) And boy is he pissed. But Veronica holds her ground.
And we have successful baboon transfer! Veronica and Seth plan to go on vacation (yeah, that’s going to happen). But, hm, the editor guy (Stathis, I think) is causing problems Veronica has to deal with. He’s trying to horn in on the project, saying “I don’t want you (Veronica) to disappear from my life.” Oh, and then he asks for sex. Classy. Veronica shoots him down.
Hee, Seth has figured out Stathis and Veronica’s deal and is pouring out his troubles to the baboon and a bottle of alcohol. Uh oh, he’s talked himself into teleporting himself, while the baboon bats at a fly that buzzes around its head. Here we go, folks, with an hour left of the movie, it’s time for the wackiness to commence. *sigh* Good bye, hot young Jeff Goldblum, I’m really going to miss you. Especially when parts start falling off. *zap* (to the baboon) “Am I different somehow?” Oh dear.
Okay, so here’s the part where he thinks he’s got super powers now. Sorry, Seth, maybe if a spider had skittered into the telepod with you, but no. You know, speaking of hot young Jeff Goldblum, I’m kind of thinking this scene is a little something to make up for what’s going to happen later. Da-yum.
Aw, Seth dumping tons of sugar in his coffee while he babbles about the telepod “purifying” him. Hm, he wants to teleport Veronica, but she says no. “Something went wrong,” she says. “Drink deep or taste not the plasma spring!” he says, and storms out. Um... what?
Uh oh, arm-wrestling scene, I’ve heard about this too. Seth’s gone out to a bar to... Whoa! Okay, doesn’t matter, he gave his opponent a nasty open-fracture wound that left the guy shrieking like a child. And now Seth’s carrying a floozy up to his place. He tries to convince her to teleport, and Veronica shows up and sends her off. She says she had some creepy hairs growing out of Seth’s back analyzed- they’re not human, but insect. He throws her out. Bad idea, man. Not five minutes later, he peels off a fingernail- oh ick, and squirts out some fluid from his finger! Off come more fingernails, more fluid comes out. “What’s happening to me? Am I dying?” Poor baby. He’s got his computer running tests on him. “Yup, Seth, you’re part fly now,” says the computer. You can see among the sores on his face more of the creepy hairs sprouting.
Four weeks later, he calls Veronica and begs her to come see him. Oh, this will not be pretty, *cringes*. Okay, not too bad, he’s using canes, losing hair, face gray and... weird. He tells her about the fly. Ew, his shirt’s got fluid splotches on it. EW, he spits up fluid on a doughnut, and loses an ear. Veronica hugs him- a braver woman than I. But then she goes to Stathis, for reasons I’m not really sure of. He asks for a tape of Seth.
Seth’s crawling on the ceiling- the last of his super powers, I guess. His teeth have gotten weird and his eyes are darting around and his arms are weirdly thick. His breathing has a kind of vibration to it- the only word I can come up with is "purr," which is all wrong for what's going on here, but you get the idea. Okay, we are filming “How Brundle-Fly Eats,” oh boy. Thankfully, we are not shown this, but Stathis watching the tape in horror. Oh, and Veronica’s pregnant. Ah, yes- the “giving birth to an eight-pound maggot” dream, I’ve seen that. Nasty.
Hm, okay, Seth wants to decrease the percentage of fly by fusing with a “pure” human. Yeah, exactly who is going to volunteer for that, Seth? Some teeth pop out, so he stores them in his medicine cabinet, AKA “The Brundle Museum of Natural History.” Oh, also, his body is all lumpy and misshapen now. Veronica is there, clearly trying and failing to tell him she’s pregnant. He gives the “I’m dangerous, you have to go and never come back” speech, and Veronica leaves in tears. The music is very mournful.
She tells Stathis who is waiting outside that she doesn’t “want [Seth’s child] in [her] body.” Meanwhile, Seth is on the roof. I’m not sure if he heard or not. The abortion doctor is skeptical, but eventually goes along. WHOA, Seth heard! He comes crashing through the window, carrying Veronica off. “The baby may be all that’s left of me,” he tells her, “Please don’t kill me.” She says she can’t. “Too bad... too bad,” he says. Uh oh.
Stathis is creeping around Seth’s place, with a case holding a shotgun, which he assembles and loads. He looks at the computer, which shares Seth’s “Gene-Splicing Methodology.” Seth drops from the ceiling and attacks Stathis. OH GROSS! He spit acid on his hand, dissolving it to the wrist! Stathis hits the floor, and tries to get the gun with his foot, so Seth dissolves his foot off at the ankle. Veronica stops Seth before he can dissolve Stathis’ face. “Help me be human,” Seth tells her. Oh jeez, he wants to gene-splice with her. Oh man, he wants to fuse him, her, and the baby into one being. Veronica accidentally tears his jaw off as she struggles to get away. Ick, Seth’s face and legs are falling apart, becoming a lot more fly-like and disturbing. Yeah, okay, now you can tell it’s a puppet, that kind of makes it easier to take. Still freaking gross, though, in that tangible non-CGI way you really don't see anymore.
Veronica’s in the telepod, and Stathis is reaching for the gun. He aims and shoots a wire between the telepods. Seth smashes his way out of the telepod he locked himself in. The teleportation sequence starts and Seth disappears. Stathis opens Veronica’s telepod and lets her out. The computer says “Fusion of Brundlefly and telepod successful.” Oh jeez, what could that mean? Okay, it’s basically Seth, with a big metal thing sticking out of his back. He crawls toward Veronica, who’s holding the shotgun. He puts the barrel to his head and she weeps as she shoots him.
The end.
You know, yesterday I actually killed a huge fly that was sailing around my room. I’m... probably going to feel pretty crappy about that at the end of this.
Wow, this is some intense music over the credits, Howard Shore. Kind of playing up a “Dracula”-ish feeling, IMO, what with the star-crossed romance.
Hee. Hi, young Jeff Goldblum, with your slightly too wide eyes, flirting with young Geena Davis. Heh, he’s got motion sickness like David in Independence Day. Reference? Probably not.
Yeah, Geena, when a guy takes you to a secluded industrial area, it’s time to get scared. No matter how adorkable he seems. Aww, he’s playing piano! No, still creepy. “I should be leaving.” “I can’t let you leave here alive.” NO, Jeff Goldblum, that’s BAD flirting! But, since she gave him her stocking as a test subject for his teleportation device, unrolling it all sexy-like, she obviously doesn’t mind.
Mm, cheese-tastic ‘80s effects. “Look, guys, he has a com-pu-ter!” (I can’t help myself.) But I did like when the other telepod flashed behind him and he didn’t look. Hm, he doesn’t really know how all the parts of his machine work? That’s unfortunate, I can already tell. And, okay, Seth Brundle is kind of an idiot if he thought he could bring Reporter Veronica home promising to show her something awesome, and then get upset when she wants to write about it.
Mmkay, Veronica’s involved with her jerk-ish editor, who she finds in her shower when she goes back to her apartment. Yeah, send him packing, Veronica, though you should’ve got that key. Or maybe not, from what I’ve heard, the jerk-ish editor guy has a part to play when things get weird.
Oh, uh oh, teleporting the baboon, I heard about this, *cringes*... Ewww. Yeah, that was pretty bad. Did it have to still be moving? I don’t think it had to still be moving. Oh gross, Veronica wants steak after that? Jeez, lady. Whoops, here comes the romance, complete with cheesy ‘80s alto saxophone.
Hm, okay, we’re trying to teleport the steaks, and the music indicates it’s going to work. Teleported steak = not tasty, as it happens. People say “flesh” a lot in this movie. But oh boy, Seth’s worked out how to stop living things from exploding in his telepod! But oh no, jerk-ish editor guy has discovered Veronica’s still working with Seth! (She said she was giving up on the story.) And boy is he pissed. But Veronica holds her ground.
And we have successful baboon transfer! Veronica and Seth plan to go on vacation (yeah, that’s going to happen). But, hm, the editor guy (Stathis, I think) is causing problems Veronica has to deal with. He’s trying to horn in on the project, saying “I don’t want you (Veronica) to disappear from my life.” Oh, and then he asks for sex. Classy. Veronica shoots him down.
Hee, Seth has figured out Stathis and Veronica’s deal and is pouring out his troubles to the baboon and a bottle of alcohol. Uh oh, he’s talked himself into teleporting himself, while the baboon bats at a fly that buzzes around its head. Here we go, folks, with an hour left of the movie, it’s time for the wackiness to commence. *sigh* Good bye, hot young Jeff Goldblum, I’m really going to miss you. Especially when parts start falling off. *zap* (to the baboon) “Am I different somehow?” Oh dear.
Okay, so here’s the part where he thinks he’s got super powers now. Sorry, Seth, maybe if a spider had skittered into the telepod with you, but no. You know, speaking of hot young Jeff Goldblum, I’m kind of thinking this scene is a little something to make up for what’s going to happen later. Da-yum.
Aw, Seth dumping tons of sugar in his coffee while he babbles about the telepod “purifying” him. Hm, he wants to teleport Veronica, but she says no. “Something went wrong,” she says. “Drink deep or taste not the plasma spring!” he says, and storms out. Um... what?
Uh oh, arm-wrestling scene, I’ve heard about this too. Seth’s gone out to a bar to... Whoa! Okay, doesn’t matter, he gave his opponent a nasty open-fracture wound that left the guy shrieking like a child. And now Seth’s carrying a floozy up to his place. He tries to convince her to teleport, and Veronica shows up and sends her off. She says she had some creepy hairs growing out of Seth’s back analyzed- they’re not human, but insect. He throws her out. Bad idea, man. Not five minutes later, he peels off a fingernail- oh ick, and squirts out some fluid from his finger! Off come more fingernails, more fluid comes out. “What’s happening to me? Am I dying?” Poor baby. He’s got his computer running tests on him. “Yup, Seth, you’re part fly now,” says the computer. You can see among the sores on his face more of the creepy hairs sprouting.
Four weeks later, he calls Veronica and begs her to come see him. Oh, this will not be pretty, *cringes*. Okay, not too bad, he’s using canes, losing hair, face gray and... weird. He tells her about the fly. Ew, his shirt’s got fluid splotches on it. EW, he spits up fluid on a doughnut, and loses an ear. Veronica hugs him- a braver woman than I. But then she goes to Stathis, for reasons I’m not really sure of. He asks for a tape of Seth.
Seth’s crawling on the ceiling- the last of his super powers, I guess. His teeth have gotten weird and his eyes are darting around and his arms are weirdly thick. His breathing has a kind of vibration to it- the only word I can come up with is "purr," which is all wrong for what's going on here, but you get the idea. Okay, we are filming “How Brundle-Fly Eats,” oh boy. Thankfully, we are not shown this, but Stathis watching the tape in horror. Oh, and Veronica’s pregnant. Ah, yes- the “giving birth to an eight-pound maggot” dream, I’ve seen that. Nasty.
Hm, okay, Seth wants to decrease the percentage of fly by fusing with a “pure” human. Yeah, exactly who is going to volunteer for that, Seth? Some teeth pop out, so he stores them in his medicine cabinet, AKA “The Brundle Museum of Natural History.” Oh, also, his body is all lumpy and misshapen now. Veronica is there, clearly trying and failing to tell him she’s pregnant. He gives the “I’m dangerous, you have to go and never come back” speech, and Veronica leaves in tears. The music is very mournful.
She tells Stathis who is waiting outside that she doesn’t “want [Seth’s child] in [her] body.” Meanwhile, Seth is on the roof. I’m not sure if he heard or not. The abortion doctor is skeptical, but eventually goes along. WHOA, Seth heard! He comes crashing through the window, carrying Veronica off. “The baby may be all that’s left of me,” he tells her, “Please don’t kill me.” She says she can’t. “Too bad... too bad,” he says. Uh oh.
Stathis is creeping around Seth’s place, with a case holding a shotgun, which he assembles and loads. He looks at the computer, which shares Seth’s “Gene-Splicing Methodology.” Seth drops from the ceiling and attacks Stathis. OH GROSS! He spit acid on his hand, dissolving it to the wrist! Stathis hits the floor, and tries to get the gun with his foot, so Seth dissolves his foot off at the ankle. Veronica stops Seth before he can dissolve Stathis’ face. “Help me be human,” Seth tells her. Oh jeez, he wants to gene-splice with her. Oh man, he wants to fuse him, her, and the baby into one being. Veronica accidentally tears his jaw off as she struggles to get away. Ick, Seth’s face and legs are falling apart, becoming a lot more fly-like and disturbing. Yeah, okay, now you can tell it’s a puppet, that kind of makes it easier to take. Still freaking gross, though, in that tangible non-CGI way you really don't see anymore.
Veronica’s in the telepod, and Stathis is reaching for the gun. He aims and shoots a wire between the telepods. Seth smashes his way out of the telepod he locked himself in. The teleportation sequence starts and Seth disappears. Stathis opens Veronica’s telepod and lets her out. The computer says “Fusion of Brundlefly and telepod successful.” Oh jeez, what could that mean? Okay, it’s basically Seth, with a big metal thing sticking out of his back. He crawls toward Veronica, who’s holding the shotgun. He puts the barrel to his head and she weeps as she shoots him.
The end.
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Date: 2010-07-02 08:10 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2010-07-03 01:15 pm (UTC)